Accio, Alpacas!
September 29, 2014    10:19am    1 day ago

Bill Nye is having NONE of your shit lady.

(via ;waffel-haus)
reblogged from    waffel-haus   (originally    mediaite)
September 29, 2014    10:18am    1 day ago
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reblogged from    oolivi-a   (originally    clickthefrog)
September 29, 2014    10:17am    1 day ago


is tesco feeling ok 

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reblogged from    oolivi-a   (originally    kois0)
September 29, 2014    10:16am    1 day ago
You’re born with a ton of fucks to give, so you spend them like a kid with a credit card. You give fucks about your friends, about your grades, about your fashion sense, about strangers’ opinions. You give way too many fucks about way too many things. You have so many. Then, as you get older, you have maybe 10 fucks per month, so you learn to budget them. You allocate fucks to family and career, but there aren’t enough fucks to give to the newest fads. Oh, someone at work has something they need my help with that’s outside my job title? I’ll do my best to allocate some fucks, but this month is pretty tight. Then, as you get even older, you’re down to 1-2 fucks per month, and those fucks are pretty damn precious. You give them to your family and your hobbies and your job, and that’s kinda it. It’s not your fault – fucks expire too quickly. I would’ve liked to save my fucks from when I was younger but I can’t. Then, you hit fuck insolvency. You’re getting like 1 fuck a year, and you have to make it last. So you go without, and even previously fuck-worthy things, you just can’t give a fuck. Some people run out really quickly, Some people have a fuck trust fund that pays out a decent amount even into old age. But at some point, the fuck faucet runs completely dry and you’re out of fucks to give. It’s just basic Fuckonomics.

Unknown English Teacher (via memewhore)

How can we start a retirement plan

(via lacostume)

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reblogged from    genuinelytricked   (originally    swarthyvillain)
September 29, 2014    8:04am    1 day ago


when u make a joke and the whole class laughs


(via ;davidbennettinplacesheshouldntbe)
reblogged from    davidbennettinplacesheshouldntbe   (originally    scissor)
September 29, 2014    12:32am    1 day ago
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reblogged from    ohpierre   (originally    carrottoes)
September 29, 2014    12:28am    1 day ago


This girl’s crazy by Courtney Miller

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reblogged from    peevesies   (originally    vinegod)
September 28, 2014    11:53pm    1 day ago









A tip from your favorite nurse

(that’d be me)

Always have eggs in your fridge

You just never know when someone will split their head open

Or cut their finger while cooking

And so on

See that membrane there?

While the blood is gushing - hold pressure and crack open an egg

Peel that there membrane off and put it on the wound (continue holding pressure)

The membrane will harden and keep the wound closed until you can get to the ER for stitches

If you even need them that is

Nature: 1, Band aids: 0

You’re welcome.

I did some research on this (because I do that now, fucking science get out) and it seems that this was done in the early 1900s somewhat frequently. It was used as a way to treat just about any kind of skin wound, from burn to cut to in at least one case an ulcer. It actually helps the wound heal not by preventing blood loss but by replacing part of the skin tissue and helping it grow.

It also helps in healing scars and reducing their visibility.

Whoah science.




Also, if you have a splinter, smack one of these things on there and it will draw it out of your skin. No more shitting around with pliers.

it will also suck the poison stuff out of mosquito bites and stop them from being itchy

woaaah i didnt know!! awesome stuff :D

Did not know the mosquito bite or splinter thing!  EGGS—IS THERE ANYTHING THEY CAN’T DO?

They cant fix the economy

(via ;captainrat)
reblogged from    captainrat   (originally    ehretha)
September 28, 2014    11:49pm    1 day ago



okayyy can everybody stop talking shit about ppl who give their dogs and cats all-vegan diets, i fed my cat all raw vegan food since he was a kitten and he lived a very happy four years :)


(via ;renniesane)
reblogged from    renniesane   (originally    phatarthur)
September 28, 2014    11:33pm    1 day ago


When you trip and your spaghetti falls out your pocket by KingBach

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reblogged from    blushbot   (originally    vinegod)
September 28, 2014    11:32pm    1 day ago
1,538 plays


I wanted to give a little comparison of Thomas’s singing voice versus the Technologic baby voice 

but I’m out of it on wisdom tooth fun so it might sound like no don’t drink and music, kids

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reblogged from    aninstantcrush   (originally    thejoggingdead)
September 28, 2014    11:30pm    1 day ago
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reblogged from    weareqroot   (originally    romanoss)
September 28, 2014    11:27pm    1 day ago



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reblogged from    spinerox   (originally    faineemae)
September 28, 2014    10:55pm    1 day ago



I actually did laugh when I saw this in theaters because this is a very real guilt tactic parents use and it’s 100% effective.

It’s called gaslighting

(via ;cuntsman-sniper)
reblogged from    cuntsman-sniper   (originally    elsakingdom)
September 28, 2014    7:21pm    2 days ago


Dietmar Voorworld is an artist who takes rocks, pebbles and leaves he finds in nature and turns them into memorable pieces of circular land art.


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reblogged from    oolivi-a   (originally    asylum-art)